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  • Writer's pictureJackie Hartsoe

Layout

I feel like all I do is apologize for being late and this is no different - sorrryyyy. I don't have a life so really there's no excuse. This time the interior of the house is not the nightmare realm my other project was. The reveals are so far not ghastly so I'm going to give you kind of an overall concept of how we are rearranging this house. Feel free to weigh in, I will disregard your opinions completely but if it makes you feel involved who am I to stop you? Right now this is what we're working with -

The footprint for the house is essentially useless - you walk in and you have a formal living & dining room where it feels like disgusting Jello recipes were probably served as "meals"

Voila

Immediately upon entering there is a foyer with no discernible purpose:

SICK terazzo floor and room to take off all your clothes (don't act like that's not every homeowners dream) Then through that opening there is a formal living room

This room is for when someone shows up in a carriage unannounced and you have to receive them but honestly you'd rather be doing anything else so you leave them there to die.

(same) Then a formal dining (where the adults sit at Thanksgiving dinner)

Notice the beige carpet and nonsensical chair rail! And in fact this is not a closet but a kitchen - there are some telltale signs like appliances but they're all from the last upgrade in 1985 so you may not recognize them for what they are:

(this bakes stuff)

(space age contraption for dish sanitizing)

(not sure what this one does) Then we have a HUGE utility room - because who would rather have a large kitchen and a small utility room? Not me. Swap em. I want to be able to do a full dance routine while I get fully naked in the utility room.

Something about entering a home makes me want to get naked and my therapist blames my mother... jk I don't have a therapist I'm super well adjusted and don't need one. Nothing troubling to see here. Here's the breakfast area (where the kids sit during Thanksgiving)

You think that paneling is nice? Wait til you see the DEN

YEAH BUDDY I'll walk you through the rest later this just has so many square feet I'm exhausted.

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